My first love.

Day 01 – Introduce yourself
Day 02 – Your first love( the rest of the days )

Well. There are a ton of ways one can answer this one. I mean. My first love was my mother. I defended her with my wee fists and big tears. We were a team.

Or, my first crush. I think that'd be Christopher Lindstrom, who by the way, is still super adorable. I haven't interacted with him since about 7 years ago when I dropped my wallet outside a deli, and he gave it back to me.

Or, my first high school crush, whom I thought I was in love with. What did I know. Christopher Rahimi. Boys named Chris, LOOKOUT. Oh, he was so angsty with his big baggie skater pants and too much metal in his face. He died when I was 18, he was just 19. I'd seen him a week or two before. He said how he was joining the Army or something. No more drugs for him, he said. Before he died of a heroin overdose. *sigh* What a waste. One thing that stands out for me during that, was hugging his friend Mike, who I'm pretty sure sold him the shit. He said he was sorry about a thousand times, just to me. My friend John, who was tight with both of them, and maaay have been with Mike when he sold Chris the shit, was... inconsolable. To this day I wonder how John is doing. We had a weird not-relationship...

But.

I think my first love would be Alan. He was my first boyfriend. The first person I said "I love you" to, and actually meant "hey, I wanna spend my life with you" kind of love.



At the American Museum of Natural History, in NYC. Circa... 2003?

I was a late bloomer. Shocker. I didn't get my first boyfriend till I was 21. The reality of the situation is I was very awkward. One day I went from being very troll like and bad teeth/braces, thick glasses, BAD hair, worse skin, etc, to looking like this:



Literally overnight. Awkward looking from like, 5 to 17/18. And by that time? I was just convinced I was gonna be lonely for a while. I had friends, but. Whatever.

However. I started going to QXTs. OH BOY HOWDIE. Wait, you mean... there *ARE* people who accept me for what I look like and I don't have to look like cookie cutter Barbie to get a man's attention?? HOLY SHIT.

Self confidence, along with some make up, is a sexy thing.

Insert Alan. He came along just as I was really coming into my sassy attitude. A friend of his brought him to the club since we'd all had a blast the week before. He caught my friend Jayme's eye, and well. Downhill from there. Heh.

Then, after some interesting circumstances, Alan and I started flirting. At the club. Online. I didn't think much of it. He was far from the only one I was flirting with and vice versa. But for some reason, he really didn't let me go far. And one day, boof. He asked me to be his girlfriend. How does the protocol for this go? I said yes.

Now, the buffoon, he dropped the L-bomb like, 2 weeks after we were officially dating, where I asked him to be a date to one of my sorority sister's wedding. I did not respond. HA. Cause, I didn't love him. I barely knew him! But. Eventually I did fall in love with him.

I don't know how much is family loved me at first. I met a couple of them, Sophia & Herk, after my cousin's wedding since we were in the neighborhood. So, then, I meet all one million of his loud, Cuban (and some Puerto Rican) family members at a surprise birthday party for Sophia. Great. The ONLY ones I know, and their the main guests. I was so pale and gothie and, well. Not Cuban. Alan did not have the best track record in the world with girlfriends, I was soon to find out. But. Somehow it worked.

And they loved me. Like, when I dropped Alan off at his Aunts' house once a few years ago, Rosie said "God, you did so much better" when she met Jim. Alan was like "ROSIE. I AM RIGHT HERE." And she said "Yeah, I know. I love this girl." HAHAHAH...

*cough* Anyways.

Both our worlds collapsed a year later, and we moved in together. We were in a relationship for 2.5 years. Then, after that dissolved, we lived together for another 9 months. Till he decided joining the Air Force was the thing to do. See, he never had much structure in his life, and well. Where better to go. *shakes head*





Anyrate. We still stay in touch. He was just out here for my birthday extravaganza. He needs to take better care of his beetus, but, hopefully he'll take some responsibility for once in his life. Tard.

Our relationship now is more of that pesky brother/sister thing. He's a dumbass and I let him know why.

So. There's my first love.